I disappointed my boss on Tuesday. It’s a new feeling, and not one I like. I knew I disappointed him because I could feel him watching me, wanting me to do something, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to.
We were at PubCon, sitting at a table in the exhibit hall when a woman came up to us and asked us if any of us would like to be interviewed on camera talking about digital marketing. Right away, my boss volunteered me, but I shook my head.
I was angry. He knows I’m terrified of speaking in front of people. Being filmed is even worse. And yet he volunteered me. On the spot, just like that. No preparation.
The woman looked excited, told me they couldn’t get any women to participate. I didn’t look at my boss as I shook my head and declined her offer. I could feel him watching me, disappointed.
It kind of feels like I’ve been letting down a lot of people lately, myself included.
This was the toughest week in every way possible. I know you’re not supposed to wish time away, but I’m glad this week is coming to an end. I just want to put it behind me.
Four weeks until Maui. I can’t put into words how much I need this mini-vacation.